I am going to be honest with you.....

What's the first thing that comes to your mind when someone says that?

So were you being dishonest with me so far?

yeah! me too. I really wonder why people say that. It puts me off like nobody's business, especially when I am interviewing someone and in the middle of the interview they say 'oh I am going to be honest with you.....' ohh my god! Usually I stop asking questions after that disclosure or if i do, it is just to be polite. I once actually replied to this woman with a 'thank you so much for deciding to finally be honest with me, I appreciate that.' Well, she didn't get the sarcasm, she just smiled.

No, i have never hired someone who has used that sentence, or kept them for long. Maybe that is my bias against this particular combination of words, but so it is.

And yes, I know there are exceptions to the rule. I am sure I have probably said them myself too at some point, but i am sure that in those circumstances it was perfectly justified ;)

The thing that no one tells you

about growing older is that you don't actually feel older.

Inside, you are still the same. You feel old enough at twenty, and that is where you probably stay the rest of your life. Yes, here and there you feel jaded and tired and think that is what it means to be older, but not really. Your perception of how old you are, remains constant. It is the outer signs that change, people's expectations from your behaviour perhaps, that makes you think you must act a certain way to fit your particular age.

Sometimes, i still get surprised that i am 33 and have my own home and kids and i manage them all fine, all by myself. Because sometimes i cannot distinguish my 33 old self from the 20 year old me, who was a girl in her parents house and whose only concern in the world was to make sure that her mom does not catch her chatting on the phone when she was supposed to be studying.

Now, when my mom is visiting I am still scared of her catching me on the phone when i was supposed to be doing something else, or reading a book when she thinks I should be talking to her and not ignoring her. I should have better manners she says, she is a guest here. Guest! what guest? You are not a guest, you are my mom!

Maybelline eye studio Lasting drama gel eyliner - Product review

i have never done product reviews before, but i want to try this :)

I bought the maybelline gel eyeliner in blackest black a few months back and I am loving this product. I have not had a good relationship with maybelline, their color makeup does not somehow suit my skin, and once one of their lipsticks smelled so bad, it put me off the brand for years.

But this product is something else. It came in a small glass pot, with a convenient brush. it is soft, goes on smooth almost like an eyeshadow, you can play with it, smudge it, get it into little places and then after a few minutes it dries and stays put for the whole day. I like how you can get it to be very dark and intense or smudged, whatever you choose, an option not available with the wet eyeliners.

The only thing you have to remember to do is to wash the brush after you are done, or the gel will harden on the brush and you will not have such smooth sailing the next time. But then, we are supposed to wash our brushes in any case - not that we do it :)

Thumbs up : 5 stars

chin up

I am going through a phase in life where I am supposed to keep my chin up and my nose to the grindstone.

Well, here is the trouble with it, incase you have never tried doing them together. You have to carry the grindstone at a very awkward angle. Sorta puts your back out :)

PRFCTFT

PERFECT FIT। Hey, that is cool for a number plate! isn't it ?

What would you rather have...

know that you are right and have everyone (almost everyone) think you are wrong
or
know that you are wrong, and have every one think you are right?

Yes I know you would want to be right, know you are right, AND have everyone think you are right too. Why not? But life just does not comply with your wishes that often now does it? So... back to the two options....How do you choose the right answer? Is the right answer the easier one or the harder one? Do you follow the path of least resistance or do you go against the grain of who you are to reinvent yourself?

Admittedly the biggest advantage of having everyone think you are right is a huge ego boost. People praise you, say you are so good or smart or something and treat you better that they would have otherwise and that should make life easier. Or would it? Would it not then give you the guilt of knowing you are not as good or as correct as they think you are? It ruined Lady Macbeth.

Of course, in my experience that is not a downer for some people who have absolutely no concept of self-analysis, and since they never look at themselves or their actions in an honest critical light, it does not affect them, so for such people perhaps it is better to be thought good of than being good on the inside.

I know that that would never work for me, I would have to set the record straight so then for me the easier choice is to actually do the right thing and if other people do not get it or choose to think ill of me then, teach myself to deal with it.

But the trouble is that even that is easier said than done. I realize that it is all fine and dandy to say my family doesn't get me, but what would you do if the law was after you and if you and the powers that be did not see eye to eye? What if you could not prove your innocence, and were sentenced because you said, hey I know I am right, the hell with what the judge thinks. Well, doesn't work does it. We know that history is full of incidences when innocent people were condemned and sentenced because the law did not accept their defense, or people who when faced with a hostile biased jury, just gave up, and did not even bother putting up a defense - why give create an illusion of legitimacy when it was all a sham. I get that. And yet, I know that it hurts like hell, to hear people say bad things about you.

Only I don't know what you can do different? I don't know whether it is so much of a choice after all. People will think what they want to, there is not much that you can do to make them think different. If they like someone they will go ahead and like every thing that person does and if they don't then they will find a fault with everything that person does. For example if someone is hosting a dinner party and specifically tells you to not bring anything, and lets say you still cook something and bring it. What happens, if they like you they will be all grateful and think ' oh how sweet, she still brought me something.' and if they don't like you, they will think ' oh what a show off, i told her to not bring anything, but she just has to do whatever she wants.' You see there is no way to win these things.

All my life I thought the answer was obvious to me, I thought I would much rather know that I am right and then the hell with what anyone else thinks. And I know I have lived that way for the most of my life. Only lately the choice came on a very huge scale, where a lot and I mean a lot of people think I am wrong and I am forced to live with that.

And it is just not easy, in fact, it is so hard that there are days when i genuinely think life would have been so much easier if everyone thought i was right and then the hell with being actually right or wrong. हाँ, हाँ, मैं फिर एक नए पतन कि कगार पर हूँ...

Anyways, it has gotten me to think about the old dilemma gain, and i have been trying to list out why the choice was obvious to me in the first place.

bundele harbolon ke munh hamne suni kahani thi

I love this poem. If I remember right, it was in my grade 8 textbook,and back then, i used to know it verbatim :)


सिंहासन हिल उठे राजवंशों ने भृकुटी तानी थी,

बूढ़े भारत में भी आई फिर से नयी जवानी थी,

गुमी हुई आज़ादी की कीमत सबने पहचानी थी,

दूर फिरंगी को करने की सबने मन में ठानी थी।

चमक उठी सन सत्तावन में, वह तलवार पुरानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

कानपूर के नाना की, मुँहबोली बहन छबीली थी,

लक्ष्मीबाई नाम, पिता की वह संतान अकेली थी,

नाना के सँग पढ़ती थी वह, नाना के सँग खेली थी,

बरछी, ढाल, कृपाण, कटारी उसकी यही सहेली थी।

वीर शिवाजी की गाथायें उसको याद ज़बानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

लक्ष्मी थी या दुर्गा थी वह स्वयं वीरता की अवतार,

देख मराठे पुलकित होते उसकी तलवारों के वार,

नकली युद्ध-व्यूह की रचना और खेलना खूब शिकार,

सैन्य घेरना, दुर्ग तोड़ना ये थे उसके प्रिय खिलवाड़|

महाराष्ट्र-कुल-देवी उसकी भी आराध्य भवानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

हुई वीरता की वैभव के साथ सगाई झाँसी में,

ब्याह हुआ रानी बन आई लक्ष्मीबाई झाँसी में,

राजमहल में बजी बधाई खुशियाँ छाई झाँसी में,

सुघट बुंदेलों की विरुदावलि-सी वह आयी थी झांसी में,

चित्रा ने अर्जुन को पाया, शिव को मिली भवानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

उदित हुआ सौभाग्य, मुदित महलों में उजियाली छाई,

किंतु कालगति चुपके-चुपके काली घटा घेर लाई,

तीर चलाने वाले कर में उसे चूड़ियाँ कब भाई,

रानी विधवा हुई, हाय! विधि को भी नहीं दया आई।

निसंतान मरे राजाजी रानी शोक-समानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

बुझा दीप झाँसी का तब डलहौज़ी मन में हरषाया,

राज्य हड़प करने का उसने यह अच्छा अवसर पाया,

फ़ौरन फौजें भेज दुर्ग पर अपना झंडा फहराया,

लावारिस का वारिस बनकर ब्रिटिश राज्य झाँसी आया।

अश्रुपूर्ण रानी ने देखा झाँसी हुई बिरानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।

अनुनय विनय नहीं सुनती है, विकट शासकों की माया,

व्यापारी बन दया चाहता था जब यह भारत आया,

डलहौज़ी ने पैर पसारे, अब तो पलट गई काया,

राजाओं नव्वाबों को भी उसने पैरों ठुकराया।

रानी दासी बनी, बनी यह दासी अब महरानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

छिनी राजधानी दिल्ली की, लखनऊ छीना बातों-बात,

कैद पेशवा था बिठूर में, हुआ नागपुर का भी घात,

उदैपुर, तंजौर, सतारा,कर्नाटक की कौन बिसात?

जब कि सिंध, पंजाब ब्रह्म पर अभी हुआ था वज्र-निपात।

बंगाले, मद्रास आदि की भी तो वही कहानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

रानी रोयीं रनिवासों में, बेगम ग़म से थीं बेज़ार,

उनके गहने कपड़े बिकते थे कलकत्ते के बाज़ार,

सरे आम नीलाम छापते थे अंग्रेज़ों के अखबार,

'नागपुर के ज़ेवर ले लो लखनऊ के लो नौलख हार'।

यों परदे की इज़्ज़त परदेशी के हाथ बिकानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,

खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

कुटियों में भी विषम वेदना, महलों में आहत अपमान,

वीर सैनिकों के मन में था अपने पुरखों का अभिमान,

नाना धुंधूपंत पेशवा जुटा रहा था सब सामान,

बहिन छबीली ने रण-चण्डी का कर दिया प्रकट आहवान।

हुआ यज्ञ प्रारम्भ उन्हें तो सोई ज्योति जगानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

महलों ने दी आग, झोंपड़ी ने ज्वाला सुलगाई थी,

यह स्वतंत्रता की चिनगारी अंतरतम से आई थी,

झाँसी चेती, दिल्ली चेती, लखनऊ लपटें छाई थी,

मेरठ, कानपुर,पटना ने भारी धूम मचाई थी,

जबलपुर, कोल्हापुर में भी कुछ हलचल उकसानी थी,

बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

इस स्वतंत्रता महायज्ञ में कई वीरवर आए काम,

नाना धुंधूपंत, ताँतिया, चतुर अज़ीमुल्ला सरनाम,

अहमदशाह मौलवी, ठाकुर कुँवरसिंह सैनिक अभिराम,

ज़ख्मी होकर वाकर भागा, उसे अजब हैरानी थी,बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।

रानी बढ़ी कालपी आई, कर सौ मील निरंतर पार,
घोड़ा थक कर गिरा भूमि पर गया स्वर्ग तत्काल सिधार,
यमुना तट पर अंग्रेज़ों ने फिर खाई रानी से हार,
विजयी रानी आगे चल दी, किया ग्वालियर पर अधिकार।
अंग्रेजों के मित्र सिंधिया ने छोड़ी राजधानी थी,
बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी॥

विजय मिली, पर अंग्रेज़ों की फिर सेना घिर आई थी,
अबके जनरल स्मिथ सम्मुख था, उसने मुहँ की खाई थी,
काना और मंदरा सखियाँ रानी के संग आई थी,युद्ध श्रेत्र में उन दोनों ने भारी मार मचाई थी।
पर पीछे ह्यूरोज़ आ गया, हाय! घिरी अब रानी थी,
बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी॥

तो भी रानी मार काट कर चलती बनी सैन्य के पार,
किन्तु सामने नाला आया, था वह संकट विषम अपार,
घोड़ा अड़ा, नया घोड़ा था, इतने में आ गये सवार,
रानी एक, शत्रु बहुतेरे, होने लगे वार-पर-वार।
घायल होकर गिरी सिंहनी उसे वीर गति पानी थी,
बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी॥

रानी गई सिधार चिता अब उसकी दिव्य सवारी थी,
मिला तेज से तेज, तेज की वह सच्ची अधिकारी थी,
अभी उम्र कुल तेइस की थी, मनुज नहीं अवतारी थी,
हमको जीवित करने आयी बन स्वतंत्रता-नारी थी,
दिखा गई पथ, सिखा गई हमको जो सीख सिखानी थी,
बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी॥

जाओ रानी याद रखेंगे ये कृतज्ञ भारतवासी,
यह तेरा बलिदान जगावेगा स्वतंत्रता अविनासी,
होवे चुप इतिहास, लगे सच्चाई को चाहे फाँसी,
हो मदमाती विजय, मिटा दे गोलों से चाहे झांसी।
तेरा स्मारक तू ही होगी, तू खुद अमिट निशानी थी,
बुंदेले हरबोलों के मुँह हमने सुनी कहानी थी,खूब लड़ी मर्दानी वह तो झाँसी वाली रानी थी।।

old hindi movies

Here is the thing that almost always gets to me when I watch old hindi movies. They are not that old fashioned at all!! :) You know, the things they show, the things these people do, these women, how forward they are, well... I will be damned, coz here I am, this bright smart intelligent young woman who grew up in the nineties in India, and I did not have the guts to do half the things these women do. They go out for long walks with these men, they sit around sipping coffee in restaurants, and sing and dance around trees. What universe are these women from? This did not happen that way in India, not ten years back, so how come it happens in the movies.

There is Rakhi in bemisaal, going out to see kashmir alternatively one day with Vinod Mehra and the next day with Amitabh Bachhan, while the other one sits beside her sick father, Mr. Hangal. umm... what? If your father is sick, will you be traipsing around a hill station, listening to poems and singing songs with two unknown men? I mean, not to talk about the fact that you are so blatantly two timing them, but just, well the whole situation, is that plausible? Does anybody do that?

There is Nargis so coolly travelling half the country with Raj Kapoor in Chori chori. Granted she was a spoilt brat, but, really, any half brained person would not have the guts to do that. It is not safe, and most indian women I know are very very cautious people. We are forever scared of losing face, publicly and privately, we do not take these kind of risks.

Remember Zeenat Aman in Yaadon ki baraat, aahahaaa! wah! the stunts she carries out. I did not even know what a housewarming party was, untill a few years ago, I must be exceptionally backward.

Then there was Aasha Parekh in Teesri MAnzil. The fool! she is going to catch her sister's killer by pretending to be a naive woman alone in a hotel at some hill station. Her plan is to get this man to fall in love with her and then get him caught. Wow! daring hai boss. But if you think about it, if this man was so sinister that he killed her sister, is she not all kinds of a donkey to be putting herself in the same position. And more importantly why does she have to do this by herself, why can she not get her family involved. Or are they all too smart and she is the only one foolish enough to serve the purpose of an illogical story line, I mean that movie, its dialogues and situations are exceptionally B-grade, it is sad really, because the songs are so magically beautiful.

And the list goes on....

I can remember watching so many movies as a kid and thinking probably when I grow up I would have that kind of freedom to do these kinds of things, but it never happened that way. I guess the movies have always been out of sync with real life, or prehaps they have always potrayed a sliver of the population. Maybe some people out there do stuff like that. The rest just quietly walk the line, and its not that fascinating to tell stories of the people who follow the rules, so the heroines are women who are exceptionally ahead of their times. Like the stuff that Priyanka Chopra does in Anjaana Anjaani - nah! i don't think real people do stuff like that.

women with spunk

This from the devdaas post, talking about Paaro got me thinking how many other women I know who have spunk like that? How many women, when they like a guy can go up to him and say, "Hey! Genius! Hum bhi hain raahon me." I know I cannot. Not in a million years. Most women I know cannot have done that. Most women I know would rather wake up every morning and pray "Please Ramji please, ...." But then, some can.

A few. Very few. Very very few.

Like there was this one, she asked him to explain to her, just what he was waiting for? You see, he is the kind of guy who has an answer for every question under the sun, but right now, as she is asking him this question, almost for the first time in his life - he is stumped. He has no idea, what he has been waiting for. He does not even know what he should do next. So she tells him, may be you should talk to my father - "oh ! yeah! right! that! I knew that." Men! I tell you. If she had not told him, it would not have occurred to him, physics or no physics. :)


Then there is this other one.Oh boy she has loads of it. And she is the kind who wouldn't mind letting me tell you her story so I will, this is what she did.

She called him. In the middle of the night, at 2 am or some other god forsaken time like that, she called him and said come and get me. He wasn't too sure, wasn't it too late, "Can we do this in the morning? " अब ले जाते हो तो ले जाओ आकर, और नहीं ले कर के जाते हो तो वो भी कह दो , सह लेंगे हम, सहने वाले क्या क्या सह लेंगे। Poor thing, like that left many options, so he came। He came up those stairs and he wasn't sure if he should ring the bell, it was really late in the night, or very early in the morning, depending on how you looked at it. But he did not have to. She came flying out, and in a country where these things are not talked about much, at an hour when girls don't go out of homes, when she is hindu and he is muslim, right there, in the middle of that night, in the middle of those stairs, she kissed him. She kissed him and he did not know what had hit him. He did not know why she could not have kissed him all those years in school, why had she wasted all that time yapping and running around and doing everything else, instead of this? That's all it would have taken, पर नही, दिमाग तो रात के दो बजे चलना शुरू होता है। Why now? Why does she have to make things so god damned complicated?

Oh I didn't tell you, kahani me twist hai. She got married last month. It was an arranged marriage, but technically this is still her sasuraal. Her in-laws are inside. And here she is, with her classmate, her best friend, the boy she has known all her life, but has only now figured out that he is the one she is in love with, now after one month of being married to someone else. Stuff like that, it can get you killed.

Yeah! I wish I was there, I wasn't, but knowing her, she probably shot one look their side and said "Fuck off!" and walked away. Sorry they are not my words, I don't use them, but this is not my story either, this is her story and she will kill me if I don't tell it in her words.

Now, if you see her, you will see a woman who reads her namaaz five times a day, she keeps his dinner ready before he gets home and she helps their ten year old daughter with her homework. You have to see her in the evening, one minute she is talking to you and then she sees his car take that turn and she is gone. You would never guess that part of their story.

You see, normal day to day life, it hides stuff. People look different buying vegetables on the roadside. You would never know where they come from, what their stories are. Lions pass off for lambs. You would be a fool to be fooled by the exterior. He isn't. He knows that underneath this very obedient wife is still that girl, who could, if the situation warranted, look you in the eye and say "Fuck off!"

Spunk - it is the kind of thing that once you have it in you, it doesn't get out of you.

You know how they say in our culture - that it takes a lot to keep the relationship it takes nothing to break it. I think that is wrong. It takes a lot of guts to break a bad relationship, it takes a heart of steel to walk out too. Most women I know, just keep putting up with nonsense in the name of keeping a relationship. it takes a lot to get up and say stop. I am done. Goodbye. And I admire the women who can do that. And I am so glad I know a few of them. Very proud to be able to call them my friends.

I did not tell the rest of the story here, because someday, I want to tell it right, all of it.

number plates

I just realized I have not collected number plates in a while. i had a piece of paper i used to write them down on, last year or something. Well, another thing on that to do list.

February Books

It is the tenth of February and I have not completed a single book as of yet. I go through these phases, of reading and then not reading. I do not read anything, absolutely nothing in my not- reading phase. So I am really hoping that this is not the onset of the not-reading phase. That would be terrible especially because I did not even have a good reading phase for the last two years at least. I have just been cruising along, picking and leaving things here and there.

Now that i am writing it, I realize how helpless I make it sound. Its not like I am leaf in the wind or something, I guess I do have some control over what i do or do not do, so maybe I can exercise that control, maybe I can just get over myself and not allow me to plunge into a not-reading phase. hmm.. okay good, lets see how that works out, eighteen more days to go :)

January Books

Well, January started out like a fair month to read but it did not really feel that way, even though on paper it looks like i did get some reading done, i have this uncomfortable feeling about it, mostly because I started most of these books in December, so i just finished them this month, did not actually read them start to finish per say. :(( too much to do, too much TV my husband keeps recommending, oh you are going to love this, oh you just have to watch this... and the thing is , once i start it i do get hooked and there goes the book :) I am only writing the books that I either finished reading this month or books that i started but figured will never read ever :)

so lets see what we got done
Piligrim's Progress - i started it with a lot of hope but, i could not get through it, so i don't think i will pick it up again in the near future, this is as close to reading it as i am ever going to come. unfortunately. unless of course my sister decides to help me out and explain the book to me, then i might be tempted to try it again.

Bertrand Russell's autobiography - it was interesting, I really wanted to read it, but it was overdue at the library and i was not getting it done so i decided to give it back instead of paying fines. i think i am going to pick it up again soon, just was very heavy - so kinda awkward to hold while lying in bed :(

Scripts people live - Claude Steiner :) I am not writing anything about this one because either i should write a whole post about it or just shut up. So shutting up is the route i am going right now :)

Toxic in-laws - uff! i cried and cried and cried. Seriously, i did :) This was what I got from the book - a) it has happened to other people, i am not alone and b) when you are not sure if what is being done to you is right or not, imagine the same thing being done to someone you love. Would you want them to put up with it? if not, why are you putting up with it? Why should you not stand up for your self?

The Great Gatsby - Gatsby was in the same category as Mockingbird with me - the list of books i somehow do not want to read, the other one in there is Dickens' Great expectations. So its a wonder of sorts that i randomly picked up Gatsby, and then actually read it, because i cannot tell you the number of times i have picked up Mockingbird and then not read it. I have even paid library fines on it. But, boy am i glad i read Gatsby. This book has completely changed my idea of American literature. It really was a wonderful book, very simple sweet and yet very profound, in a folk lore-ish, non - grand-eloquent way. So elegant, succinct, to the point, that that in itself makes it grandiose. I did not really cry or anything when Gatsby died, but the story left me with a bit of bitterness and resentment. There were moments in there that I so completely could relate to, I admire Mr. Fitzgerald's ability to put in words feelings that can be so hard to describe, and like i said above, he does it so simply, so unostentatiously, that I am just... wowed! Like this moment, when Daisy is standing beside Gatsby, and he is happy, but he looks at the blinking light of her home across the river, and that makes him slightly sad, because now he can never look at that light the same way as he did before, when he longed to be with her, the light has now lost its brilliance. I am not doing justice to it in all these sentences, but F just says it in a matter of words, something like, "it was the loss of one more enchanted object" see, that is beautiful.
या रब दुआ-ऐ-वस्ल न हरगिज़ क़ुबूल हों, फिर दिल में क्या रहा जो हरसत ही निकल गयी।
And to me that is the mark of good storytelling। It does not matter what that emotion is - frustration, pain, pleasure, hope, anger - anything, if someone can put a bunch of words on a piece of paper and make you feel something, i think they did a darn good job.

You've got to read this book - umm.... was fine no big deal except the first part, which has made me want to read this other book, A tree grows in Brooklyn, will do

How to win friends and influence people - yeah! well... it was a nice book, it talks about some very basic things people could do in their interactions with other people. Some are intuitive, plain good breeding and some need a bit of a paradigm shift. but i must mention that i have my issues, i don't buy the premise. You see i don't think people should go about making plans to influence other people. It is demeaning, insulting, and very very rude in my opinion. Perhaps I am being juvenile and adamant with the same boorish attitude i had twenty years back, but... well that is who i am. The book like so many people before it, says you can gather more flies with honey that with vinegar, well, am sorry to disappoint you, but I am not a fly - catcher, i don't want anything to do with flies. Now I don't think I am doing justice to this book, so perhaps I should sit down and write a full post about it. Will do that too.