(i started writing this a couple of days back, so its not really snowing right now :) its hard to write in one shot what with constant interruptions and requests of mama chitdown, and ek chai bana do. grrrrrr...)
i am watching the snow settle slowly into my backyard. it is the second snowfall of this season. my daughter comes every once in a while to say hi snow, my husband is working in front of the TV, watching it, for a second every ten minutes or so, but he is going to be mad if i switch it off, so... am not gonna do that. it is these lazy afternoons that make me think leaving my job and deciding to be a housewife was actually worth it.
i love watching it snow. it is still mysterious to me. an overcast gray sky that envelopes the roofs, suddenly gives way to these soft, unassuming, modest flecks of white, that seem to come out of nowhere really. like the wind itself materializes into specks of frozen water. in one moment nothingness in another solid matter. how majestic and unpretentious at the same time. so beautiful in its descent- quiet, delicate, yielding. you could wipe it away with a hand, melts as it touches the ground, drapes the forms of things as their own second skin.
but i cannot love the snow, like i love the rain. the rain is my friend, my soul's sister, my confidante. she sings my songs, she knows my secrets, she hides my tears. i grew up with the rain. we have known each other forever. she is a part of me - she goes to the places i cannot, she visits these people i cannot, and sees things i cannot, and then she comes back, to tell me all about them, she lives for me, a life in proxy, that i cannot. the rain is mine.
i am watching the snow settle slowly into my backyard. it is the second snowfall of this season. my daughter comes every once in a while to say hi snow, my husband is working in front of the TV, watching it, for a second every ten minutes or so, but he is going to be mad if i switch it off, so... am not gonna do that. it is these lazy afternoons that make me think leaving my job and deciding to be a housewife was actually worth it.
i love watching it snow. it is still mysterious to me. an overcast gray sky that envelopes the roofs, suddenly gives way to these soft, unassuming, modest flecks of white, that seem to come out of nowhere really. like the wind itself materializes into specks of frozen water. in one moment nothingness in another solid matter. how majestic and unpretentious at the same time. so beautiful in its descent- quiet, delicate, yielding. you could wipe it away with a hand, melts as it touches the ground, drapes the forms of things as their own second skin.
but i cannot love the snow, like i love the rain. the rain is my friend, my soul's sister, my confidante. she sings my songs, she knows my secrets, she hides my tears. i grew up with the rain. we have known each other forever. she is a part of me - she goes to the places i cannot, she visits these people i cannot, and sees things i cannot, and then she comes back, to tell me all about them, she lives for me, a life in proxy, that i cannot. the rain is mine.
the snow is an alien priestess to be admired and feared. Discreetly coming down - it presents a benign face, a wispy, harmless, flake. Before you know it, millions and millions of them have settled around you. draining heat wherever they can find it, suffocating plants and sucking life off the face of the earth. it is going to stay there for months, mounds and mounds of it, getting hard, gathering grime, chilling the hearts of cold winter winds. The entire landscape lying waste to its immutable persistence.
It is a battle to keep your bodies and homes warm against the stealthy icy fingers of the north wind, it’s a battle most of us in the modern world do not appreciate, worry or even think about. Snug in our heated homes, cars, and malls we can afford to look out of our huge glass windows and call the oncoming blizzard beautiful, or the even more insulting - a nuisance. a mere inconvenience, that increases your travel time. right. sitting beside my cozy fireplace, as the wind howls and beats the other side of the wall, i wonder, what if? what if i was put face to face with this formidable force of nature? left alone, in the wild, would i have the wits to beat it? to survive? apparently we as a race did... only, will i? i am not so sure, you see...
its a hard thought to shake away, i watch it snow, anyway. i still think it is pretty and beautiful, and i am thankful for how it makes these dull winters brighter - the silver lining. and no i do not like the idea of shoveling or scraping it off of my car but i however am glad that, inside this house, i am safe,warm,protected - for now.
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